Sunday, October 31, 2010

Doc's Advice #3: What Did You Call Me?

Ciao, Reachers. Today, I want to talk to you about an important and familiar topic. Let's be real here, we have all said it. You get to some point where you are so fed up with someone, so irritated with them, so enraged by their actions that you call them a certain word. Obviously, the word I am referring to is "noob".

We've all done it. Whether it's because the person you are dealing with is annoying, a beginner, or just an all around sucky player (cough cough Foup...), at some point during a Halo game, you have probably called someone a noob. This got me thinking - How did this word come about?

Well, where does one look for information about a topic? Answer - Wikipedia (because Wikipedia is always right). A noob is defined as "a slang term for a novice or newcomer, or somebody inexperienced in any profession or activity". It also has "derogatory connotations," meaning that the word "noob" has evolved into an insult. Often spelled many different ways, like noob, newb, nub, newbie, newbee, or n00b, the origins are disputed.

One thing is for sure, the word has infiltrated popular culture today, especially in the gaming industry. For example, yesterday I was playing some Big Team Slayer with an idea. I counted how many times someone said "noob" and I would not influence them to say it in any way. After an hour, I had counted 11 separate times when the word was used. Obviously, its a common term in Halo.

But why? It could be popular for many reasons. One, it's pretty fun to say. It just rolls of the tongue. That -oob sound is kind of cool sounding. Another, it has got kind of a gamer connotation to it. I have noticed that true gamers like their own lingo. Whether it's "leet," "pwn," or "noob," most gamers like using these words to make them feel unique and special in a class apart from other people. Maybe, it's just not as offensive as some words you could use and thus preferred by some players. Instead of going on a profanity-laced rant about how bad your teammate, opponent, or friend is, you can just sum all of your anger up in one word - "noob."

Nevertheless, I end it like this. Don't fret if you are called a noob. Everybody has at some point. Noob is just a cool word. I like it. My friends like it. You should to. So I say to you Reachers, be a noob.

Movin' On Up

If you were to reach the max rank right now in game (Lieutenant Colonel Grade 3), you would find that after you fill up your bar, you cannot gain any more credits.  Your rank would not go up, and nothing would change, even after completing games/challenges.  Well, this is only a temporary thing Bungie is doing with the level "cap", and soon the whole gaming community will have this ceiling taken away.

Friday, October 29, 2010

Doc's Advice #2: The Name Game


Bonjour, Reachers. Doc here. Today's advice deals with an important part of Halo: the gamertag.

There's an old segment from Family Guy called "What Really Grinds My Gears". In this scene, Peter basically vents about something kind of odd that really gets under his skin, what truly bothers him.

I have one of those pet peeves. You know what really grinds my gears - gamertags with numbers for letters and x's in on places. How many times have y'all seen this scenario? In your game lobby, you see names like "Pr0xSn1p3r" or xXx A5sa5s1n xXx". Oh my gosh, you have no idea how much this bugs me. First off, it does not come off as cool or awesome as some believe. "Oh man, look, my name has Pr0 and five x's in it. That means I'm amazing at this game." Uh, no it doesn't. It means you think you are all that and a bag of chips, but really you just have struggled with thinking of an original name. Honestly, come up with actual words in the dictionary or something. If someone has already taken your favorite name, don't try to compensate by replacing an e with a 3 or adding x's everywhere. It look ridiculous. At least for me, it's kind of fun pronouncing each name as literal as possible over the mic then hearing the responses to poke fun at these p30p13 (see how weird that is). Example - "Uh oh, it's 3 lit 3 x ki 11 er, everyone watch out". They respond "Excuse me, it's Elite Killer, and you better bring it!". I end it with the smart-allicky retort of "Yeah, and you better get a dictionary" then mute 'em. Thus I ensure that I get the last word because, it's simple, the one with the last word wins.

So, I say to y'all. Please no x's or numbers for letters in your gamertag. I realize that I am being kind of mean. I know that their are people who like the numbers and x's. If you like it, you are more than welcome to have your gamertag be that way. It's just not for me, not my fancy. My favorites are the random adjective-noun combos like "Rabid Walrus" or something similar like that. Even names that include your own name or initials are fine with me. For example, my gamertag is "drew is my name". It's simple, semi-unoriginal, but I like it. It gets the point across, it's clever and unique, and I feel like everyone who plays with me has learned something about me. So go on, Reachers. Play the game with a decent name.

Thursday, October 28, 2010

How Your Rating is Determined

Will and Foup team up in for some Arena Team Doubles action.  Following the game, Will cheer's"Haha! I went +10 on that one! Suck on that Foup!" as Foup meekly stares at his 891 rating.  But how did Foup achieve this 891? Did the Halo Reach gods peer down upon him as he slayed his way through the game?  The answer is no. And actually, the system Bungie uses is a lot simpler, and based on easy math. 
Hit "read more" below to find out...

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Doc's Advice #1: Is Grunt Birthday Party Worth It?

Hola, boys and girls. Doc here. Today's teaching is on the armor effect "Grunt Birthday Party". Basically, for 200,000 cR's, you can buy an effect that, whenever you die, confetti flies in the air and the shouts of joy of schoolyard children ring throughout the area. A common question comes from this: is it worth it?

Some say it is a pointless addition to the game. What benefit is there from something that only happens if you die? I know some good players who believe why waste 200,000 cR's on something that happens only a few times a game. Plus, they reason that they have to die for it to work, so there's no benefit. Also, some find it annoying. There are those who can't stand the anywhere from 5 to 15 times a game where the sounds of kids yelling "YAY!" is heard in the game. Yes, maybe a bit absurd, but I know a guy who thinks that Grunt Birthday Party was created to annoy good people.
But come on guys, this thing is great. It can brighten anyone's day. Think about it. You are playing Reach. You die. Immediately, negative thoughts enter your mind - this game sucks, it's stupid, that guy's a hacker, I hate this! All the sudden, BAM! Cheers of joy come through your speakers. Confetti comes on the screen and reminds you of that time in your younger years when you were a small child, happy and innocent. Suddenly, your anger goes away.You realize "Wow, dying isn't that bad" and you continue on your way shooting and killing. The point is that Grunt Birthday Party is awesome. It's Bungie's gift to you for spending those numerous hours destroying other people. So go on people, be a kid again. Party on.

The Daily Foup

Entry#1:
According to incorrect eHarmony commercials, 1 in 5 relationships begin online. While this is some great useless information, you have to wonder how many of those relationships start on Xbox live/ Halo Reach. Regardless on how many have started there so far, I'm here to increase the number of these Halo Relationships, or as I call them Reachationships.

So if you're hunting for some Reach tail, I suggest you start in Rumble Pit because this gives the opposite sex the knowledge that you are ready to rumble. Once a lobby is set up, talk to the crowd, prospect to see if there are any special lady Spartans that seem to be to your taste. If you have found this special woman, check out her armor, and complement her because this can always increase your chances in seeing whats under that helmet. By now the voting process has definitely begun and there are two options in Foup's playbook of love that work quite nicely.

#1 Assert your dominance. Vote what you want and let her know that nothing in this Reachationship is her choice. Your the spartan in this reachationship, and your going to wear the chest piece. If you do take this stance, know that it could backfire, and she could just take you as another gamer who be trash talking her maps. Also, if you do decide to be dominant Spartan, never back down, because you never know when a woman could come and steal the chest piece and wear it for the rest of the game.

#2Vote with her. Sure it could seem like a pussy move, but hey, who said that being nice to a lady spartan couldn't get her helmet off. Being a gentlemen is always a fine choice, but make sure not to be to much of one, cause then your just gay.
The main problem with this choice is that the women may put you in the friend zone forever. You may never get to see whats under her armor, cause' she thinks you respect her.

My advice, go between the two. Be gentlemanly, but don't be afraid to tell that lady spartan whats what. And if you don't follow my advice, who the foup cares.

Good Luck to all the Players,
Foup

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Achievement Guide #1

Though Xbox 360 Achievement points may serve no actual in-game purpose, you know you can't help but grab as many as possible. Whether it's boasting to friends about your gamerscore, or feeling a sense of completion, I'm here to help you "reach" every achievement Reach has to offer. (PUN!)

In the first post of this series, I'll show you a quick and dirty guide to grabbing a possible 190 Achievement Points in just 20 minutes via a little firefight action.  Odds are, if you have already spent some time in Reach you already have some of these already, but for the rest of you, you're in for a treat.

Hola, Reachers.

Congratulations. You found our blog! This is "Reach Me How to Dougie," your online source for all things Halo: Reach. You need help with how to spend credits and what is worth buying and what is not? I got ya. You need to know different strategies to tackling on challenges or enemies in campaign and matchmaking? Will has got ya. You need romantic advice to help you maintain your relationship with your girl (or guy)? Foup has got ya. So thanks for visiting. Support us in our quest in making sure that everyone "reaches" (it's a pun) their full Halo potential. Thank you.

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